Why did the chicken cross the road?

Who is my audience?  What is my goal?  As I continue reading Undoing the Silence, by Louise Dunlap, I believe I am learning and growing as a writer, part of which has been an increase in my confidence.  In Chapter Six, Dunlap challenges the writer to know their audience.  That is so obvious it just might work!  In writing an email, a report, or a paper, the question remains pertinant, who is the audience?  Further, what is their understanding of the subject prior to reading what I have written?  Dunlap created an exercise in which the writer explores those questions.  The writer is also asked to look at the beliefs, values and attitudes of the audience.  Again, makes good sense  Having performed stand-up comedy, knowing and reading the audience is crucial!  If you are getting crickets rather than roaring laughter, it’s time to switch it up.  Gauge the audience and modify the material accordingly.  That is not to suggest that the author’s position needs to change, just the way in which it is relayed.  Why did the chicken cross the road becomes who is watching the chicken cross the road?

Personality

Recently I've been pondering personality and social work.  Use of personality is one component of being authentic within social work practice.  A few of the personality traits I value most in social workers are compassion, humor and good judgement coupled with a helpful nature.  I find that most social workers possess these things.  I believe that it is an inherent desire to help others that leads a person into social worker.  So what happens when those things aren't present?  I have recently encountered a couple of social workers who don't appear to have these traits and I am baffled by it.  Why on earth would a person who doesn't even seem to like people choose to work with people??  As social workers we typically work with people in crisis.  I know how I feel when I am under a great deal of stress, and to then encounter an individual that is supposed to help me navigate through it who is judgemental would not be helpful.  In fact I think it would make the situation that much worse.  I want someone who can be empathetic and willing to listen and also answer questions.  When I come across social workers who seem put off at the suggestion that they do their jobs, I wonder if they have always been that way or if they have burnt out.  I understand that this profession can do that to a person and often very quickly.  Well, here is a newsflash:  If you hate coming to work, then other people probably also hate that you come to work.  Time to reassess and change your career path.  You are doing more harm than good. 

The Recipe for a Good Social Worker

I love to cook and am always looking for a good new recipe. However, after scouring Pinterest, I was unable to come up with the recipe for a good social worker.  Being rather creative and comfortable in the kitchen I decided to make my own recipe and here is what I came up with:

Equal parts: 

Knowledge (of yourself, your clientele and your community) 

Values (clear in your own yet respectful of those of others) 

Skills (communication, flexibility and crisis management) 

Combine until smooth.
 
This is the basic recipe and I do not suggest altering that portion.  However, additional ingredients typically add a more complex and better flavor.  I always suggest adding: 

Sense of humor

Thick skin 

Supportive work environment 

Balance 

Also to be added per your personal taste: 

Sarcasm 

Colorful language 

One last tip: Do not overcook!  Every social worker must beware of burn out!!

This old dog.....

As I navigate this journey through graduate school, I am continuing to struggle with the writing piece.  In an effort to continue to learn and grow, I am taking stock of my process. 

Historically I have completed my writing in the “dangerous method” style that Louise Dunlap speaks of.  The dangerous method of writing being one in which all attempts are made to create a perfect product the first time through.  This means writing and rewriting and correcting and editing as I go; painfully sitting in front of my computer practically beating my head on my desk during periods of writer’s block.  With that, I made a conscious decision to step outside of my comfort zone and change my process.  I just went for it.  I started writing what Dunlap refers to as a “mad draft” in which I wrote down my thoughts, as jumbled as they were.  I made no effort to organize them.  My intent was to write down the various points and thoughts that resonated with me throughout the readings.  Again, I just went for it.

Awkward.  That’s how it felt.  In particular I found it hard to leave typos.  Seeing the squiggly red lines throughout my writing and leaving them there was physically painful.  Okay, a few times I did go back and correct them purely out of instinct. 

What I did enjoy about the mad draft process was inserting “XXXXX” when I was thinking of a specific quote that I wanted to insert.  Rather than stalling my creative process to flip through the reading, I simply made a note of where it would be going.  Additionally, when I wasn’t able to write a clear thought I would also write “XXXXX” so that I could easily come back to it.

When I finished my mad draft I was done.  I did not go back and do any editing or make any corrections.  I walked away.  I came back to it the next day and was able to rework and edit without frustration.  Then I let it go for another day.  On the third day I was able to create a finished product without any tears or anger.

I guess this old dog can learn some new tricks…

Is it worth it??

In recent days I have added a new role to the list of many that I already have.  I will call this one: Guilt Ridden Parent.  As a result of graduate school, the schedule of my family has had to change quite a bit.  My husband works 6pm-6am, so in order to participate in live class sessions and also to complete homework, we have had to hire a nanny to come to our home to help care for our two kids.
This has had a direct impact on my 3 year old.  In the last month she has displayed an incredible amount of aggression towards the other kids in her preschool class.  Today we have a school meeting in which a mental health professional will be present to discuss a "treatment plan" for my daughter.  Did I mention that she is three??  The grades of my 11 year old have begun to slip as a result of my decreased time spent doing school work with him.
I made the decision to go back to school for my family.  However, is the resulting damage worth it?  The guilt I feel is overwhelming.  Is this a phase or am I helping to create long term damage?
As I am weighing this out, I am also thinking about the $40,000 that graduate school is going to cost coupled with the dismal at best communication with instructors.  I am paying just as much as on campus students, but they get a few hours a week of time with instructors.  I can hardly get an email.  It is only week 5 of 182 weeks. 
I am going to school to enhance my lifelong desire to have a positive impact on the lives of children yet my own children are being negatively impacted.  The irony isn't lost on me. 

A refugee camp? Is this for real?

The disabled Carnival Cruise ship is being compared to a refugee camp.  Really?  That is a valid comparison?  I feel like that is an insult to refugees worldwide.  I’m sure that sleeping on couches rather than in cabins was inconvenient.  I bet it sucked waiting in long lines for food.  HOWEVER, they had couches to sleep on and food to eat.  A luxury that many inside and outside the US do not have.  We have become such an entitled people!!  The cruise line is refunding the cost of the cruise, giving them another cruise as well as $500 cash, yet, that isn’t good enough.  I can’t wait to see the law suits start flying just so I can get a glimpse of the financial payout for the pain and suffering of having to share cell phone chargers!!  The atrocity!!  Certainly their experiences are right up there with that of the other tragedies of our country such as the slave trade and the Trail of Tears.  If I have to endure any more coverage of the cruise ship “survivors” I may gouge out my own eyes.

 

What I have to say is important, dammit!!
As I mentioned previously I'm not a big fan of journaling or writing my thoughts down. I can write a report based on factual information for days. No problem. Give me a topic that I have passion for and knowledge about. Nailed it. However, when it comes to my "feelings" about things, I'm not one to share. That's not true, actually. My closest friends would tell you that. Clarification: I don't like to share with people I don't know. It brings a sense of vulnerability, and who likes feeling that way??
In an effort to embrace this process, I completed a free writing exercise from Undoing the Silence by Louise Dunlap. If I wasn't clear about it already, this is something I do not enjoy doing (writing or exercising, hahaha).
I did the affirmations exercise and used the statement "What I Have to Say is Important to Many People". I found that about half of what I wrote validated that. I do have knowledge and experience to share with others. The other half of what I wrote focused on the importance of listening and discerning when listening or speaking is best.
My final thought through the process was that I joke around. A lot. Does that help or hurt me when I have something of value to say? Am I taken seriously?